personal mastery ended!!!!!
i think quite a lot of people cried yest!
I KNOW SO MANY PEOPLE WHO HAD A BAD DAY ON FRIDAY!
so to KAILIN, LECIN AND TASS, CHEER UP (:
LECIN THINKS THAT IT IS CAUSE it was the 26th which is twice of 13th (friday the 13th!)
well whatever the reason is IT IS OVER (:
oh and THANKS KENNETH!


i kind of felt motivated DURING THE WORKSHOP i just hope it lasts this time :( IT MUST OF I WILL FAIL O LEVELS.
pleasepleasepleasebemotivatedAmelia!


I JUST WATCHED G.I. JOE!
ohmygoodnesssssssss it was COOL!
i felt so free this weekend AND I DEFINITELY CELEBRATED THIS WEEKEND by watching lots of TV and SIMPSONS!
now the weekend is over :(


I have no idea how much longer i can try to pull everything together. I am trying so hard i think i am going to wear out pretty soon. It is so difficult just trying to act like i am not affected, acting like everything i do doesn't have another reason behind it. But i will promise myself that i won't shed another tear, not over this cause it won't do any good. Why must it be so tough just to put together all the broken pieces, if a child can fix a puzzle, surely i can do this. I think i need more patience, but i think i ran out of it.

I can't help but notice, you don't seem to give a damn.

I'm going to admit it once. i think i get possessive and jealous over one thing.

just finished THE WORKSHOP TODAY!
ohmygoodness it is long I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I SURVIVED IT THE LAST TIME AND HOW I SURVIVED IT TODAY!
it was the exact same thing... ADAM KHOO!
same instructors, same memorising skills and what not.
OH GOSH!
but on the bright side, THE WEEKEND IS HERE AND THERE IS NO HOMEWORK :)
how good does that feeeeeeeeeeel!!!!!!!!!!


i just want to lie here, under the endless skies thinking about nothing. I want everything that is troubling me to escape from my mind, one way or another. How is it possible to want something to end so badly but yet, never want it to come all at the same time. The fear in me is driving me insane, how i keep telling myself that i shouldn't be afraid and i would be happier, but i know i am just deceiving myself. I can't stand the thought of losing everything i have overnight. Everything that was once important to just disappear.

SINCE I JUST REALISED KAILIN READS MY BLOG,(i never knew)
THIS IS FOR KAILIN: "do you want fish fillet, chicken fillet, beef fillet"
"FISH GLUE FISH GLUE"
" GREEN NOODLES!"

I JUST REALISED I GOT PHOTOS FROM CNY! HAHHAA THEY WERE AWKWARD PHOTOS.

WE GOT INTO TOP 2 :):):)
PLAYED FINALS TODAY we lost 3-2 BUT IT WAS A REALLY CLOSE FIGHT.
to CHELSEA, RUIJIA, SANDRA, SAMMY, OLLY, YING MEI, CHERYL, SARAH AND NAT YAP!


you guys played really well for the season to get us into finals :) SO THANK YOU! YOU GUYS TRAINED SO HARD AND IT ALL PAID OFF :)WE WILL BE LEGENDARY!!!!!!! IT IS THE FIRST TIME IN 10 YEARS. That is pretty damn cool ;)I LOVE SC TENNIS :)
THANKS GUYS! YOU GUYS ARE A-W-E-S-O-M-E!


omg cheeered like CRAZY! LEX AND I WERE LIKE WOOOOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOOO! screamed and screamed and screamed! the whole kallang could hear us :D
omg i got a stupid sunburn and stupid square sun tan from umpiring in my uniform. WTH! i only discovered it today! it is so red and it is so OBVIOUS. OHMYGOODNESS :(


my tests has beeen so screwed up! i have been BORDER LINE PASSING FROM EVERY FREAKING TEST :( I AM STARTING TO GET WORRIED.
workload has been MUCH LESS NOW. i guess that's good and bad cause there is less stress but i am starting to SLACK, too much! :(

i think i heard something that i didn't want to hear.
i think i am overthinking and turning it into a nightmare.

UPDATE!
omg training was fun!
BUT WE HAD TO RUN! sandra and i kind of walked 3/4 OF IT!
chelsea was smsing random people as usual!
so then we decided to sms IRIS (sbs transit!)
" HEY IRIS, HOW'S THE PUPIL COMING ALONG ;) "


oh had chem test on Friday! it was pretty okay! i think i got two questions wrong already! but i kind of expected it to be harder!
OMG AND MISS WONG IS SERIOUSLY, A WALKING WIKIPEDIA!
she was telling us all about these random things i forgot how they were linked.
then she told us about this country SAXON.
then rachel was like "SAXON FIRE!" hahaha TWO THUMBS UP CHAN!
we had remedial :(:( i hate how whenever it is FRIDAY AND SCHOOL HAS FINALLY ENDED, we have remedial after that!
IT'S SUCHA DOWNER.


SATURDAY! WE HAD TRAINING!
Ying Mei was damn funnnnny!
so she was playing with my phone when kenneth smsed me and asked what a baby shower is.
and Ying Mei doesn't know as well so we told her " it is when everyone watches a baby shower for the first time"
hahaa and she believed that and smsed Kenneth that!
THAT WAS SUPER FUNNY!
oh and i kind of had no mood to play tennis :(
AND WE HAD TO PLAY LADDER SO I JUST KEPT LOSING.
tennis lost its meaning :(


went to church after that! it was pretty alright! i kind of missed cell :(
didn't go for service though! i had dinner!
OMG THE FOOOOD WAS SO GOOOOOD!


cheryl lau is leaving tonight :( ANOTHER 4 MONTHS TILL WE SEE HER :(


Suddenly, when you are all caught up in it you just forget what you really want.
when that disappears, you are left with nothing.

OHMYGOODNESS! chem is in 9 hours!
i am so screwed.
i cannot memorise a thing!
MY HISTORY IS SCREWED BECAUSE I HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA HOW TO DO IT.
and my amath IS UNTOUCHED.
shitshitshitshit.


Everything seems to be so different right now.


i lost sight of what mattered and somehow i can't put it back in place.
i forgot how it used to be and now it is just a blur.

WENT TO KENNETH'S HOUSE YESTERDAY FOR CNY!
mich, nat,kai, mark, cheng went as well!
WE MADE PIZZAS!
it was pretty okay actually!!!
we played pictionary, taiti, and i have no idea what!
WIILLIAM, AS USUAL WAS SUPER DUPER CUTE! I LOVE HIM!
and matthew as usual, WAS BEING CREEPY!
HAHHA BUT it was fun playing with everyone :)
went to orchard with nat after that!
we bought accessories and catched up! THERE WAS SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT!
i haven't talked to her in AGES :(
went for dinner with my mum, brother, valerie, sister and zach.
KOREAN FOOD WAS SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOD (y)(y)(y)
time to lose weight!
ALL THIS EATING IS NOT GOOD!


i haven't started on ANY WORK!
OHMYGOODNESS I NEED TO DO MATH!
DIEDED :(
HOW TO DO HISTORY!


well, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!


you know the feeling of having something.
something that you absolutely can't have.
but it is the feeling of trying that makes it so fulfilling.

WHAT IS YOUR NAME???

Went out with RACHEL AND WENN ER ON FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!
went shopping :)
i bought my dress and skirt! OMG FELT SO GOOD TO GO SHOPPING!
then rachel's friend, esther, joined us after that!
we went to watch VALENTINE'S DAY!
it is so cuteeeeeeeeee and sweeeeeet! PATRICK DEMPSEY, BRADLEY COOPER AND ASHTON KUTCHER! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
walked around 313 after that finding wenn er's shoes but couldn't find anything :(
THE START OF CNY HOLIDAYS!

WENT OUT WITH THE BUTLERS(sarah, wanqi, shennen, dione) +KAILIN ON SATURDAY!
omg we ate so so so much!
FELT LIKE I WANTED TO EXPLODE AFTER THAT!
wanqi made some random comment in the middle of our meal, which i still cannot forget!
hahha sarah's expression was CLASSIC TOO!
dione, wanqi and kailin MADE US WAIT FOR AN HOUR :(
HAHAH!
WENT OVER TO ION AFTER THAT to eat HOKKAIDO ICE CREAM!
IT WAS GOOD (y)(y)(y)

we are into SEMIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Our match against RGS was kind of CLOSE! but AT LEAST WE GOT INTO SEMIS :) SO THAT IS (y)(y)(y)
OMG IT HAS BEEN SO HOT RECENTLY!
ohmygosh!!!!!!!!
NOT MUCH HAPPENED!

SCHOOL IS OVERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!


HAD HISTORY AND SS TEST THIS WEEK
i screwed up so badly :(:(:(
I GOT 9/25 FOR HISTORY. LOWEST IN CLASS.
shit :(:(:(
I AM SO SCREWED FOR SS TOO cause i studied source B instead of D!
smart or WHAT!
i didn't do too well for chem too :(


Played SMSS on wed! we won 3-2!
omg it was a scary match for Ruijia And Chelsea.
BUT THEY WON ^^ GOOD GAME JIA AND CHELSSSSSS.
hahaha chelsea was damn funnny!
"i already gave myself the glare"
We were supposed to play today against RGS but it was raining.
AFTER THE CRAZY HOT WEATHER FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS IT DECIDES TO RAIN TODAY.
awesome!!!!!!!!


Training was funnny!
Played MAX 3. OMG BEAN IS LIKE SOME NINJA.
AND lex, sarah and bean kept cheating >: (
STUPID AGAIN AND AGAINS
hahahaa chelsea is a BAD INFLUENCE
"again, AGAIN!"
Then nat was looking through my wallet and found my mum's name card and was like WHO IS THIS.
AND i was like MY MUM
nat :" YAH RIGHT THEN WHY IS HER NAME NG PHECK CHOO"
me: "HER MAIDEN NAME LAH!"
nat : "YAH RIGHT DON'T LIE TO ME!"
me : " REALLLY NAT DON'T BELIEVE ASK LEX!"
nat: "LEX WHAT IS AMELIA'S MUM'S NAME!"
lex : "NG TIAN HOCK!" (wth!)
then nat stilll REFUSE TO BELIEVE.
so i smsed my mum "MUM WHAT IS YOUR NAME!"
hahhaa then when i shouted over to nat, MY MUM REPLIED. she lost her point!
hahhaha! SERVES YOU RIGHT NAT!


OMG AND i told nat my mum's chinese name was BI ZHU (seriously)
and she said THEN SHE SHOULD HAVE CALLED YOU BI ZHUI!
HAHAHHAHA!right, enough dialogue.
OMG i have damn freaking funny pictures of ruijia sleeping and then don't know who stuck TWIGS IN HER HEAD!
DAMN FUNNNNY!
i call jia TWIGGY NOW :)
but nobody laughed along with me >: (


LESSONS HAVE BEEN QUITE BORING.
at least we don't have as much homework!
OMG I HAD THE WEIRDEST CONVERSATION WITH WENN ER AND RACHEL.
it was funny though.
and got ACCORDING TO YOU stuck in my head!
"according to you, blah blah blah (i forgot)"


YES I DON'T NEED TO WEAR GLASSES TO SCHOOL NEXT WEEK!
that's it.


i honestly want to tell you.
just tell you what's been bugging me because i don't think i can stand another day of it.


As i see the morning sun set,
i tell myself that we are staying up all night.
we will stay awake for another sunrise.

TOURNAMENT TODAY!!!!!!!
beat IJ (tp) 4-1 :):):)
ALEXIS, I WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR "LAURA", "PETER" AND "
VERONICA" !
i love sam ong's camera!!!!!!!!!!!
omg the hip hip hooray part was funnny!
"3 cheers and 3 cheers and 3cheers for CHIJ............................TP"
hahhaha!


HOW TO STUDY FOR HISTORY :(
OHMYHISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!


it's the feeling of disappointment
when you think you see the finish line,
but turns out you are only halfway there.

ANOTHER WEEK HAS ENDED.
school hasn't been THAT BAD I GUESS.
WORKLOAD IS MUCH LESS!
cell was kind of fun, I AM SO GLAD I HAVE SMALL FEET.
UNLIKE ZAC OR LINCOLN!
hahhaha!
Service was great


SUNDAY!
went to visit Kenneth with Nat cause he has appendicitis.
we bought him the COOLEST BALLOOONS!!!!
OMG BRAVERY AWARD... CLASSIC!!!!!!!!!!!!
other than that NOTHING MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I HAVE FOUND THE JOY IN STUDYING